The banner says: Click here to visit the agents’ bios page and choose only one agent to whom you will submit your query.
Their pictures lined up, agent bio, ready to be chosen. Their names; Commercial, Upmarket, Mystery, Thriller & Romance. Some posing demure, one statuesque, another stern worn from battle, but all distant.
It must be like a first date; kindness and humor make a great first impression. Good looks and good manners are a plus. Intelligence and insight make me want to know more.
One says Platonic. Perhaps my query should go there. It might have a better chance of being read, and besides – you never know – magic might happen.
I’ll send my query on a Tuesday, it’ll catch them off guard. No, hand deliver it, maybe catch an agent in an elevator.
Copy, paste, I close my eyes, click.
Eleven weeks pass by when an email arrives; Thank you for your query. Unfortunately we do not think the project is right for us. We receive so many queries that it is not possible to reply on an individual basis. My client list is currently quite full, however, and I am therefore taking on very few new writers. I wish you the best of luck in finding representation anywhere.
They wished me luck.